Guys, this is really exciting. I am in New York right now and I have amazing news…I am a wombat! Isn’t that great? Let me explain.

I met up with my cousin yesterday, one of my favorite people in the world, and he told me about Primal Zodiac signs. (If you think astrology stuff is garbage, stop reading. I don’t know if it is or not, and I don’t even know if it’s my business, but I think it’s interesting.) Your Primal Zodiac is a combination of Western Zodiac and Eastern Zodiac signs, so in my case, I am Taurus, and I was born in the Year of the Boar.

In Primal Zodiac math, that makes me a WOMBAT. I love wombats.

Now, I am not going to make you read my wombat zodiac, but I definitely thought about it. According to the internet, which never lies, I am

• Strong, determined, sensitive, and stubborn. (check)
• Can be a reclusive weirdo until the wombat feels comfortable with her people.
• Once the wombat is comfortable, wombat will not stop talking. To everyone.
• Smarter, stronger, and more agile that people think
• Also, and this is a direct quote “This sign can be painfully over-indulgent and procrastinating to the point that others wonder how it is they get by day to day.” (um, check)
• When the wombat does stop watching Netflix, the wombat cannot be stopped.
• Wombats like cosy, familiar places, and like nice things (check)
• Wombats like wine, and “they do like to indulge in worldly pleasures a bit too much.” (This is kind of a judgy website, jeez.)
• Hosting parties is their wombat jam, and they don’t really like the club. Wombats don’t like crowds.

I won’t go into the love stuff too much but a few important things:

• Wombats are great friends, love giving advice and like small groups
• Wombats are cautious, but when they commit, they commit.
• SUPER SNUGGLY
• Should trust be betrayed “expect to see the rare but legendary rage from this quiet but powerful sign.” Wombat Khaleesi up in here.

 

Lastly, career things, which I really like reading about right now.

• Even though they can be shy, wombats put on a good show, and love storytelling
• Wombats love creative self-expression and the arts (check)
• Wombats are LAZY (check) and need inspiration and drive of they will just eat ice cream off their bellies all day and watch Brooklyn 99 in their underwear (I’m paraphrasing.)

 

I know how silly it is that I just wrote out my zodiac stuff on this blog, I know that. But I have never read anything that sounded more like my best friend describing me. I am making Tiff do this too, and I want you guys to look and see if your description works for you, too. Do it here, click. Do it, and tell me what you think.

Your favorite wombat.